MMM - {Pause}

My Marriage series is coming to a momentary pause. The next story is written; just not for the blog-sphere at this time.

But I leave you with some food for thought today:

"A magnificent marriage begins not with knowing one another but with knowing God."

                                                  - Gary and Betsy Ricucci

All my worship

I'm linking up with Erika at More Time With Our Kids with a worship song that spoke to me this week!






Singing along with Jeremy Camp's version of, "You're Worthy of My Praise," the other day, those words all my worship hit me in a way I had never heard them before. It made me think about...

when I'm working on a project that consumes me...

all my worship.


When I'm working on home design that I fall in love with...

all my worship.


When I'm writing something I can't break away from...

all my worship.


When I am ultra proud of one of my children...

all my worship...


When I feel worthy of praise...

all my worship.

When I feel in distress...

all my worship.

When {you name something}...

all my worship.


Anything that pulls me away from or diverts my attention from Christ; anything other than Christ that I allow to consume me would be idolatry. He alone is the source of all that I have and all that I am. He alone is worthy of my praise.

Moments like these...

I just love moments like these...

Robby's "From A to Z" Book...

"The letter 'a' says a (short) and A (long)"

 Each letter says it's sound(s) all the way through Z 

{although my scanning job cut the storyline out}

After a long phase of dragons, we're back to dinosaurs! 

{again, my scan job cut the storyline out}

"The Tyrannosaurus is a carnivore."

Alexa's "A to Z" Book  

{She colored the pages then drew pictures that started with that letter on each page}

Alexa, apple, and alien

Other things Alexa likes to draw...

Mermaids

Tulip off of the dining room table

Princess - don't you love the ruffles?

and moments like these...

and milestones...

 when I expect to find my baby lying in her crib as I go into the nursery, I see it for the first time - oh how I...

love This!

How we met

Shuffling into the restaurant, about six of us - near strangers - scrambled to find our seat. I nonchalantly pulled back the chair and sat next to him only because he sat across from my friend and the seat next to her had already been taken. I peered across the table listening to the words of my boisterous friend, who somehow got on the topic of, "God is just an idea..." It was a topic I had heard before; one that I had learned to ignore. I wouldn't be persuaded nor would I persuade her. So, I avoided those conversations, as I did much of the content that challenged the very core of what I believed up to that particular point in my life.

However, the next thing I knew, this guy sitting next to me - whom I had not spoken even one word to since our unofficial group encounter just days ago - was speaking up. I don't recall those exact words that straightened my posture nearly twelve years ago, but I recall having no choice but to chime in.

We alternated affirmations, with complimenting points, "YEAH, and...," "Right, and..."

My eyes widened and my heart sprang forth as I had been overtaken by the proclamations of this guy. It was as though I had suddenly noticed him for the first time.

I went home that night intrigued...

Who was that guy who proclaimed so boldly a belief in the one true God?


Who was that guy who said he owned over 100 Christian CDs? Did that many Christian artists even exixt?


Who was that guy who grabbed my attention and literally woke me up?


Who was that guy who spoke like he knew so very personally my first love?


You see, I grew up knowing Jesus Christ as my Savior. I knew He was good and that He loved me. I trusted Him. I just wasn't willing to trust Him with my whole life.

I had decided I knew better than anyone what I was looking for in the love department. After all, it was easy for me to determine what would and wouldn't interest me in a guy, who was and wasn't a decent guy, and who would or wouldn't pursue me like I was the only girl on the planet. I could easily tell who made me feel special and who didn't.

I wasn't looking for a godly guy, someone who was trusting God with his whole life. I didn't believe that kind existed. I didn't even know any godly men and, truth be told, never ran across any in my dating years up to that point.

Isn't that what happens when we seek outside of God's character?  We simply find everything but, godly character. 


Good guys. Decent guys. Just the wrong guys.

There came a point that I had even lowered those initial standards. I did a little more of the pursuing. I sought to feel special. I clearly couldn't expect the fairytale. I didn't expect much.

I remember telling a friend that if that next guy (whom I had already scoped out) was not the one, then there would be no one for me. I believed that. I was tired of disappointment; tired of gambling in a game that was being played too casually with my heart.

Something changed that round. I had inevitably been pursued, however, not by that guy. That ended, too. I remember that day, humbled by my circumstances; when compromise would no longer camouflage my existence. Oh, how I wanted to run; crawl into a hole – but, there I was backed up against the wall of my own captivity. I knew what I had to do. It’s true. I could see no further than “that next guy.” I threw my arms up – finally – and surrendered. I admitted I couldn’t control this outcome. I had already compromised the belief that there was something more – someone worth waiting for. I had compromised what my heart deeply desired and was yearning for - God. I surrendered my choices and committed to allowing God to take the pen and write this story.

One month later, I pulled back the chair and sat next to him...

My First Love

He saw me and knew I was the one. I was so young and naive when I first met him. Although my very existence cried out to him, I didn't really know him. It wasn't until I came face to face with him in full surrender that the sweet romance began.

He's the one who called me by name before I came into existence...

...who did not rescue me in my grief but, lead me through the valley.

...who pursued me when I chose a different way.

...who chased me when I ran.

...who accepted me when I turned back.

...who comforted me when I was lost.

...who protected me when I was left vulnerable.

...who offered me his hand when I fell.

...who lifted me when I was broken.

...who cherished me - for me.

...who summoned me and said I was his.

In my surrender - sweet surrender - I came face to face with death. Death of my own desires. Death of my own destination. Death of life as I knew it.

I came face to face with humility and grace. Awe and wonder. Abundance and blessings. A new life transformed.

My heart is riveted by his presence. I become flustered and limp in his arms. 

Yet, I am still found guilty of turning my gaze to the distance, of wonder if there is a more provoking love, of something more I must be missing.

Yet, he continues to lead me to the desert. He allures me there with his tender words. And in a place of desertion, loneliness and confusion he gives back what is my hope. And I know there is no other.

An undeniable romance.

Faithful to no end.

A lasting love. 

A fairytale love.

Is and always will be my first love.
***


Today I am simply grateful for the lavish love that fills the very well I draw from to pour out and love well those around me.

Guest-blogging today

These days I seem to constantly be in a two-year-old stage with a two-year-old running around the house - just one after another with four children the age of six and under - and there's never a dull moment. The reality is, sometimes I look at myself and (spiritually speaking) wonder if I have ever out-grown that stage.  I'd like to say I have but, there are moments...I wonder if you can you relate. 

I'm guest-posting over at Penny Zellers blog, Penny Zeller ~ A Day in the Life of a Wife Mom and Author, today on one of my favorite posts that captures the essence of how I can be just as stubborn as my two-year-old when it comes to wanting to do things my way!


I am honored to know Penny personally and am so encouraged to be in a Christian writers bible study that she leads, Write His Answer.

Penny is a wonderfully gifted woman who loves the Lord.  She is the author of several books including her most recent Montana Skies Historical Romance Series, books #1, McKenzie, and #2, Kadie (coming in April 2011!). She is currently working on her third book in the series.


If you are in this area, on March 5, Penny and Cathy Slikker Vlahos, author of  A Snowman's Gift  will be speaking on The Everyday Woman: Going from Ordinary to Extraordinary. Please come to the Wesleyan Church from 9:30-11:30 a.m. for some refreshment(s) and inspiration.

Now take a hop on over to Penny's blog and please share a comment. I'd LOVE to hear your thoughts on this topic!

Are you amazed?

I once heard the statement, "You can't be amazing until you've been amazed."

 "Have you never read in the Scriptures, 'The stone that the builders rejected has become the cornerstone. This was the Lord's doing, and it is amazing in our eyes.'? Matthew 21:42

So much amazement surrounds us that cannot help but shout and echo the glory of God.

Have you opened your eyes and ears and heart to be amazed lately?


I'm linking up today with WFW at Internet Cafe Devotions and Scripture and a Snapshot at Katie Lloyd Photography {the blog}. Join us, won't you?

You are beautiful

As I held her tight and uttered those words, "You are beautiful," she smiled big and curled her solid little body right into mine - forehead to forehead, nose to nose, with just a hint of wet lips brushing my nostrils.

At nine-months-old, she couldn't have known what I just said.

But, she knows.

She knows not the words that spill out of my mouth into thin air but, the expression that spills out deep from within my heart piercing hers.

From the place those words flow, she knows. She believes.

"I am beautiful."

So sweet. So innocent. So pure.

And I wonder how I know I am beautiful? Tainted, guilty, contaminated me?


I think about as they grow and scrape their elbow or bump their table height head - and they come running.  They run into our arms and feel our warm caress as we lift them up. Then immediately they wiggle their way down declaring, "I 'kay, I 'kay," and scurry off again.

A little love and reassurance let's them know everything will be okay.

A little more time goes by and a scratch may bring them running, seeking the affection they desperately crave now that they are too gangly to be held.

Their tears carry on.

We tell them they're okay.

They grow some more and they are injured again, not from torn flesh this time but from a torn heart.

Mom and dad are no longer there.

There seems to be no where to run. They hold their chin up and keep going because that is what big people do.

How many times do they just keep going before they can't go anymore? Trying to be what they are expected to be. Trying to control what little they can control. Determined they must do it on their own now.

Where is the beauty, they wonder?

Mistakes. Guilt. Contamination.

They fall.

They are broken.

With no will left, no reserve - they surrender.

Surrender to the God who has been knocking. The God who has been pursuing. The God who has been chasing.

Surrender the expectation, control, and pride.

Suddenly they are lifted.

Lifted by a sense of peace, comfort, and knowing.

Knowing there is forgiveness.

Knowing that everything will be okay.

And though they don't hear those three words uttered in the form of the tool created to articulate expression, the expression simply pierces their heart and they feel held. Held tight. And they are drawn nearer as they curl their very being into their Heavenly Father's arms and know - just know.

"I am beautiful."

So sweet. So innocent. So pure.

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I'm linking up with Mamma's Heart today at It's grace.

Do Not Judge

A multi-tasking mother will put chocolate syrup in the cereal instead of the milk sometimes.

And give her two-year-old coffee.

But, who's complaining? 

(He gobbled that cereal right up,too!)

"Do not judge, or you will be judged." Matthew 7:1

Need I say more?

I simply found humor in this picture this morning and had to share it!  Have a beautiful, laughable, light-hearted, multi-tasking day!


For more scriptures and pictures go to Internet Cafe Devotions for Word Filled Wednesday, A Beautiful Mess for Wordless Wednesday, 5 minutes for mom for Wordless Wednesday, My Organized Chaos for Wordless Wednesday, and  My Wee View for Wordless Wednesday, and Katie Lloyd Photography {the blog} for Scripture and a Snapshot.

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