Do you have a vision for your home? A picture of what you want your home life to look like? Something you're working toward or maybe far from?
A very simple vision statement may look like this: A peaceful dwelling to enter into, in the midst of life happening.
This one comes to mind because we determined here that having a peaceful home is not about doing it all, but first about having our priorities in order. Therefore, once we have a vision for our home, I believe we must determine our priorities, then we can set some goals and make a plan!
In our home, we would order our priorities as the following: God first, then spouse, children, extended family, friends. These can easily fall out of order for us, but determining them will help set our goals and make a plan.
So once we've considered our vision and determined our priorities, where do we start? Consider answering these three key questions that I have found helpful in setting some goals:
1. What have we already established? I like to look at what is already working for us first. Rather than looking at everything that we're not doing, let's recognize what we are! These are the things that we may take for granted because, once they are established, we hardly think about it. They are things that have become our daily or weekly traditions. It is not a struggle. There is cooperation and order, for the most part, and it serves to enhance our lives. If we think about it, we'll find many things that are already working!
Examples of what is already working for us:
Morning devotion before school. This helps our kids wake up and get out of bed, knowing they get some snuggle and reading time before breakfast and finally preparing for school. The value in it is that it trains them to put God's Word at the front of their day.
Saturday morning breakfast feast around the dining room table. This has become a tradition for us that we look forward to every Saturday morning. Normally, we eat breakfast at the breakfast bar so, this provides one more opportunity to gather as a family. It also lends itself to training in table manners and talking about the day ahead as a family.
2. What are we currently attempting to establish yet, may not be ordered yet? This is where we want to start. We want to put our focus on one goal and give it ample time to form as a habit before attempting to conquer another (or more, if reasonable). These are things you are already aware of and are successful at some of the time, but not consistently because it has not yet become a way of life. You likely have several things that you're working on that simply need refined.
Examples of things we are currently working to establish:
*Structuring after school time to dinner time.
*Prioritizing ways I can bless my husband every day.
*Saturday morning chores.
3. What do we desire to establish? Write these down in your game plan. Begin to do one of these new routines only when your current routine of focus is established.
Examples of things we would like to establish:
*What Sally Clarkson calls anchors throughout our day - those moments where we are reading together, enjoying a tea time, etc. and preparing for the next portion of the day.
*Daily chores
I have found that trying to accomplish too much at once can be overwhelming and cause us to shut down. Without a vision, a goal and a plan, we'll give up and think it not possible, assuming we just don't have what it takes.
So consider first the big picture: what is your vision for your home? Determine your priorities. Then consider those goals. Finally make a plan of action. Start small and build upon it. With dedication and perseverance, you'll get there!
Sharing with Finding Heaven, A Pause on the Path, Seedlings in Stone, Write it, Girl , Raising Homemakers and The Better Mom
This is so helpful and practical, Theresa! I need to remember number 1 -- what is already working. It's so easy to see the things I still need to work on, but, by God's grace, we are doing some things right! ;-)
ReplyDeleteThank you Teresa, for your reminder. I miss you and think of you often! Your practical advice helps me all these miles away and I thank you.
ReplyDeleteVery wise post.
ReplyDeleteoh, how i like this! it always looks good in books, but seems so hard to apply. you've broken it down into smaller steps. maybe i can really accomplish this when digested this way :-)
ReplyDeletethanks so much for sharing!
steph
I love how you walk it out so well that even {I} can follow these steps. Thank you :)
ReplyDeleteThank you for taking the time to share your heart and write what works for your family. Sometimes it encourages and just helps me so much to hear what other families are doing in the day-to-day. I do have a "picture" of what I want my household to feel and look like, but I find myself frustrated and guilt-ridden too often when I fall short. God's grace is sufficient, and I'm slowly learning to receive so I can better give it out to my hubby and kiddos.
ReplyDeleteGREAT thoughts here! :) Visiting from Write It, Girl!
Wow! I love how you've broken it down into "do-able chunks." Am smiling just picturing your morning devotion time. My little ones refuse to eat before snuggling before breakfast! Savor that snuggle time, I can't remember the last time my 13 year old sat close enough to snuggle :) Blessings today!
ReplyDelete